My name is Arturo Santander, I am 70 years old and my daughter Natalia woke me up on a Tuesday morning to tell me that she had to vacate my room because her in-laws were going to come to live with us. Dad, you’re going to have to move into the back room. Andrés’ parents need the master bedroom. Those were his exact words. But what she didn’t know is that at that precise moment, while she was asking me to leave the room where I had slept for 45 years, I had already made the most drastic decision of my life, to sell the house without telling anyone.

But before I tell you how I came to that radical decision, I have to take you back in time so that you understand exactly what kind of man it was that had just been displaced, as if he were an annoying tenant, because what my daughter was about to discover was going to change her life forever, but no longer in the way she expected. It all started three years ago, when Natalia divorced her first husband, Gustavo, after 12 years of marriage. They had two children, Sebastian, 15, and Martina, 13. The divorce was very traumatic for the whole family, especially for the boys, who did not understand why their parents could no longer live together.

I had lived alone in my four-room house since my wife Carmen died 5 years ago. When Natalia asked me if she could come and live with me temporarily with the children until she got organized, of course I said yes. Dad, it’s only going to be for a few months until I find an apartment for the three of us. A few months turned into a year, a year turned into two. And just when I thought I was finally going to regain my peace of mind, Natalia met Andrés, a 42-year-old divorcee with a son from his previous marriage.

At first he seemed like a good man, hardworking, polite, affectionate with Natalia’s children. Papa Andrés is amazing. He’s the man I’ve been waiting for all my life. What he didn’t tell me at the time is that Andrés came with a complete package. Not only did she have a 10-year-old son named Bruno, but she also had parents who required constant attention. Andrés’ parents, Roberto and Miriam, were 75 and 73 years old, respectively. Roberto had been a bank manager until he retired and Miriam had been a housewife all her life.

According to what Andrés told me, they had sold their house to move to a smaller apartment, but things had not gone as expected. “Don Arturo,” Andrés told me the first time I met them. “My parents are going through a difficult economic time. The apartment they bought turned out to have legal problems and they had to leave. Of course, they had nowhere to go.” Natalia, who was completely in love with Andrés, immediately offered to help. Dad, don’t you think we could accommodate Andrés’s parents here at home for a while?

Here at home, Natalia, there are already five of us living in this house. Now there are going to be seven. It’s temporary, Dad. Only until they fix their situation. Temporary. That magic word my daughter used whenever she wanted to convince me of something she knew I wasn’t going to like. But what really bothered me wasn’t that she wanted to help her boyfriend’s parents. What bothered me was the way he presented it to me, not as a consultation between adults, but as a decision already made that I had to accept.

Dad, we thought they could use the guest room. They’re going to be super comfortable there. The guest room was the smallest room in the house. It had an old double bed, a tiny closet, and a window that looked out onto the neighbor’s yard. It wasn’t exactly what I would call super comfortable for an elderly couple, but I agreed because she was my daughter, because I was in love, because I thought it was really going to be temporary. Roberto and Miriam arrived on a Saturday morning with three huge suitcases and an attitude that made me immediately understand that this was not going to be as temporary as they said.

“Arturo,” Roberto told me as I helped him carry the suitcases, “you should know that we appreciate your hospitality very much. We hope we won’t be a nuisance.” We hope not to be a nuisance. Famous last words. The first few days were relatively quiet. Roberto and Miriam remained in their room. They went out little, they tried not to get in the way, but little by little the dynamics of the house began to change. Miriam began to give her opinion about the food that was prepared. Oh, Natalia, don’t you think there’s a lot of salt?

Roberto began to control the air conditioning. Arturo, can we lower the temperature a little? Miriam is very hot and worst of all, they started complaining about the guest room. Natalia, I heard Miriam say to my daughter one afternoon, “That room is too small for the two of us. Roberto can’t even open his entire suitcase.” In addition, Roberto added, “That bed is very soft on my back. The doctor told me I need a firmer mattress. Oh, of course. Now it turns out that my guesthouse did not meet the medical standards required by my uninvited guests.

But what really started to bother me was that Natalia started treating me like I was a tenant in my own house. Dad, could you not use the morning shower so early? You wake up Roberto and Miriam. Dad, could you not watch TV so loudly at night? Roberto has a hard time sleeping. Roberto had a hard time sleeping. I had lived 70 years without anyone telling me what time I could take a bath or what volume I could use on my television.

But suddenly, my lifelong routine had to adapt to the needs of guests who had come to my house with no departure date. A month after they arrived, the complaints escalated to a whole new level. “Natalia,” Miriam said to my daughter over breakfast, “That room is really not appropriate for people our age. Roberto wakes up every night with back pain.” “And what do you suggest?” asked Natalia. And that’s when I heard the craziest proposal of my life.

Well, your dad’s room is much bigger, has a private bathroom, and surely the mattress is better. Couldn’t some exchange be made? Any exchanges? This woman was suggesting that I leave my main room so that she and her husband could be more comfortable in my home. I hoped that Natalia would immediately reject that ridiculous proposal. I waited for him to tell him that my room was mine, that I was the owner of the house, that if they were not comfortable they could look for another place, but no.

Instead, my daughter looked at me with that look she made when she was about to ask me for something she knew I wasn’t going to like. Dad, what do you think of the idea? What do I think? What idea, Natalia? The idea of changing rooms with Roberto and Miriam. Are you serious, Dad? They are older people, they have health problems, they need to be more comfortable, older people. Roberto was 75 years old and I was 70. Since when did 5 years of difference make them elderly people who deserved my room?

Natalia, that’s my room. It’s where I slept with your mother for 25 years. It’s where she died in my arms. Dad, I know it has sentimental value, but it would only be temporary. Temporary. That word again And if I refuse, Dad, you won’t refuse. You were always a generous, generous person. My daughter was using my kindness against me to convince me to give my room to her in-laws. That night I couldn’t sleep. I lay awake thinking about the conversation, about Natalia’s expectant face, about Miriam’s satisfied smile when she understood that my daughter was seriously considering her proposal.

I felt like a stranger in my own home. The next day, during breakfast, Roberto approached me with that fake smile that people use when they want something. Arturo Natalia told us about the possibility of exchanging rooms. We want you to know that we appreciate it very much. I haven’t decided anything yet, I replied. Of course, of course, there is no hurry, but we want you to know that if you agree we will take care of keeping the room in perfect condition.

They were going to take care of keeping my room in perfect condition in my house. The audacity of these people knew no bounds. Over the next few days, the pressure increased. Miriam began to complain louder of back pain. Roberto began to mention his sleep problems in each conversation and Natalia began to look at me with that disappointed face she made when I didn’t do what she expected. “Dad,” he said to me one afternoon over coffee. Roberto is really suffering in that room.

Yesterday I heard him complain of pain all night. “And why don’t they look for a more comfortable place to live? Dad, you know that they don’t have economic possibilities at the moment. Oh, of course, they didn’t have the financial means, but they did have the possibility of asking me to leave my room so that they would be more comfortable. The logic was impeccable. Natalia, do you understand what you’re asking of me? I’m asking you to be understanding of two seniors who are having a hard time.

You’re asking me to leave the room where I lived with your mother, where she died, where I have all my most important memories. Dad, they’re just memories. You can have those memories in any room. Only memories. My daughter had just reduced 25 years of marriage and 45 years of living in that room to just memories. The straw that broke the camel’s back was when they started talking about it in front of my grandchildren. Sebastian, Miriam said to my grandson during dinner, don’t you think your grandfather should be more considerate of us?

Considered how? Sebastian asked that he didn’t understand anything. Well, we are older people and we need to be more comfortable. Your grandfather has the largest room in the house. My grandson looked at me in confusion. Grandpa is going to move rooms. We hope so, Roberto replied with a smile. It would be a very generous gesture on his part. They were using my own grandchildren to pressure me. They were turning a private decision into a family issue where I was left as the selfish one who did not want to help the poor sick old men.

That night I called my sister Leticia, who lives in Rosario. “Leticia, I need to tell you what’s going on here.” I explained the whole situation to him. How had Natalia’s in-laws arrived? How had they settled in, how did they now want my room? Arturo told me after listening to everything, “You realize that they are kidding you. How are you being treated like a tenant in your own home? And the worst part is that your own daughter is leading the abuse.

But Leticia, Natalia is in love. She wants to help her boyfriend’s family. Arturo, it’s one thing to help and another thing to trample on your own father. Do you think that if the situation were the other way around, Andrés’ parents would give you their main room? Leticia was right. I knew she was right, but I also knew that if I refused, Natalia was going to make my life miserable. She was going to make me feel guilty every day. I was going to become the villain of the story.

And what do you suggest I do? Arturo, you’re 70 years old. Do you really want to spend your last years being abused in your own home? So what? Done to my daughter and my grandchildren. No, brother, but you can set limits. You can say no. After talking to Leticia, I felt more strengthened. I was right. It was my home, my room, my life. I didn’t have to give in to the pressure of guests who had become squatters. The next day, over breakfast, I made the decision to speak out.

“Natalia, I want you to know that I have decided not to change rooms.” The silence at the table was deafening. Roberto stopped chewing. Miriam looked at me in surprise. Andrés cleared his throat uncomfortably. Are you sure, Dad? Completely sure. That’s my room and I’m going to continue sleeping there. But Dad, Roberto and Miriam really need Natalia, Roberto and Miriam are guests in my house. Guests adapt to the conditions offered to them. They don’t demand changes. Roberto cleared his throat. Arturo, we understand your position, but there are no ifs and buts, Roberto.

If the guest room is not comfortable for them, they are free to look for another place to live. The tension could be cut with a knife. Natalia looked at me with a mixture of anger and disappointment. Dad, I can’t believe you are so selfish. Selfish. For wanting to sleep in my own room, in my own house. You are selfish because you don’t think about the needs of others. Natalia, for 3 years I thought about your needs when I let you live here with your children. Then I thought about the needs of Roberto and Miriam when I let them live here too.

When is anyone going to think about my needs? That argument marked the beginning of the cold war in my own home. Natalia stopped talking to me, except when it was strictly necessary. Roberto and Miriam greeted me coldly. Even Andrés, who until that moment had been respectful to me, began to look at me as if I were an obstacle to his family happiness. But I stood my ground. It was my house, my room, my decision. I was not going to give in to emotional blackmail. However, things got worse when Roberto began to have more frequent nighttime seizures, moans of pain that could be heard throughout the house, constant complaints about his back, about the mattress, about the lack of space.

It was obvious that he was exaggerating his symptoms to generate additional pressure. “Dad,” Natalia said to me one morning after a particularly noisy night from Roberto. “Are you really going to be so numb anymore?” Poor Roberto can’t sleep. Natalia, if Roberto has serious medical problems, he should go to the doctor, not ask me for my room. He’s already gone to the doctor. The doctor told him he needs a firm mattress and a more spacious room. So, buy himself a firm mattress for the guest room.

You can’t be so cruel, Dad. I’m not being cruel, Natalia. I’m owning my own house. The following weeks were unbearable. Roberto increased his nightly moans. Miriam began to sigh dramatically every time she saw me. Natalia spoke to me in monosyllables. Andrés avoided eye contact, but what hurt me the most was seeing how my grandchildren began to look at me differently. Sebastián, who had always been very close to me, now seemed distant. Grandpa, he said to me one afternoon, why don’t you want to help Roberto and Miriam?

Sebastian, I’m helping them. I give them shelter and free food in my house. But Mom says you could do more. What else could I do? Give them your room. Sebastian, would you give your room if someone asked for it? I don’t know, Grandpa, but you’re big, maybe you don’t care that much. That was the problem. My own grandchildren were beginning to believe that because I was big my needs mattered less, that because I was the grandfather I had to sacrifice everything for the comfort of others.

The situation reached the breaking point on a Tuesday morning. I had slept poorly because Roberto had moaned all night. I got up early, as always, to make myself a coffee and read the newspaper in peace before the whole house woke up. But when I went down to the kitchen, I found Natalia preparing breakfast with a strange energy. “Good morning, Dad,” she said with a smile I hadn’t seen in weeks. “Did you sleep well?” “Not much.” Roberto was in pain all night.

“Yes, I know.” And that’s exactly what I wanted to talk to you about. He poured me a cup of coffee and sat down in front of me with that attitude he had when I had made an important decision. Dad, Andrew, and I talked all night. Ah, yes. And what conclusion did you reach? We came to the conclusion that this cannot continue like this. I agree. Roberto and Miriam should look for another place to live. No, Dad. The solution is not for them to leave.

The solution is for you to move into the back room. What? What you heard you’re going to have to move into the back room. Roberto and Miriam are going to use your room. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Natalia, are you kicking me out of my own room? I’m not kicking you out, Dad. I’m relocating you. Relocating to my own house, Dad. It’s the only sensible solution. Roberto really needs that room for medical reasons and my emotional reasons don’t matter. Your emotional reasons are understandable, but Roberto’s medical reasons are more urgent.

I sat quietly, processing what I had just heard. My own daughter was informing me that I was going to be evicted from my room. She wasn’t asking me, she was informing me. And if I refuse, Dad, we hope you don’t refuse. It would be very selfish of you. And if I still refuse, then we’re going to have to take other measures. What measures, Dad? We don’t want to come to that. We hope you understand that it’s the best thing for everyone. For everyone or for Roberto and Miriam?

For the whole family, Dad, including you. You’ll see that the back room is very quiet. The back room. The room we used to store old things. The smallest, darkest room in the house. That was the place my daughter thought was appropriate for her 70-year-old father. Natalia, do you understand what you’re telling me? I’m telling you to be practical, Dad. You’re telling me to leave my room so two strangers can be more comfortable.

They’re not strangers, Dad. They are Andrés’ family and soon they will be my family too. Ah, that was the key. Andrés had proposed marriage and Natalia already considered her in-laws more important than her own father. When do you expect me to make this change? Today, Dad. Roberto had a terrible night. We can’t wait any longer. Today, Andrés and the boys are going to help you move your things to the back room. I couldn’t believe the efficiency with which they had planned my eviction.

They already had everything organized, all that was missing was my cooperation and if I did not cooperate, they were going to take other measures. I got up from the table without finishing my coffee. Okay, Natalia. I’m going to move my things. Seriously, Dad. Aren’t you going to make trouble? I’m not going to make any problems. His face lit up. I knew you were going to understand. You’re the best dad in the world. The best dad in the world. The same dad I had just kicked out of his room. I went up to my room and closed the door.

I sat up in the bed where I had slept for 45 years and made the most radical decision of my life. If my daughter thought she could treat me like an annoying tenant in my own home, she was sorely mistaken. I pulled out my phone and called the largest real estate agency in town. Good morning. Arturo Santander speaks. I have a house to sell. What kind of house, Mr. Santander? A four-bedroom house in the Las Flores neighborhood. I need to sell it urgently. Urgent.

How? I need someone to come and take her today. I want to close the sale in less than a week. Are you sure, sir? Such a quick sale usually means accepting a lower price. I’m sure. Price is not the most important thing. At 2 hours the cupper arrived. He was a young, very professional man who went around the house taking photos and measurements. It is a very nice property, Mr. Santander, in excellent condition. How much do you think it can be worth? In a normal sale you might ask for $10,000, but if you need to sell fast you would have to settle for about 150,000.

Perfect. How long would it take to find a buyer? With that price probably a week. It’s a bargain for any buyer. Excellent. Prepare the papers. While the tazator finished his work, I packed my most important things in two suitcases: clothes, documents, photos of Carmen, some objects with sentimental value. Everything I really needed fit in two suitcases. When the cupper left, I went downstairs with my suitcases and put them next to the door. Natalia saw me from the kitchen. Have you finished moving your things to the back room?

No, Natalia, I finished packing to leave. To go, where? I’m leaving my house. What do you mean you leave your home? I’m leaving because it’s not my home anymore. When someone can kick me out of my own room, it means that I am no longer the owner. Dad, don’t be dramatic. No one is kicking you out. No. So what did you just do? I asked you to change rooms. You didn’t ask me, Natalia, you informed me. You told me I had to move into the back room so your in-laws could use my room.

But, Dad, it’s temporary. Natalia, that word is enough. Nothing that happens in this house is temporary. Roberto and Miriam are never going to leave and you know it. At that moment Andrés appeared. Arturo, what’s going on? What’s happening, Andrés, is that I’m leaving my house. Why? because of the issue of the room, because of the issue of respect, Andrés, or rather because of the lack of respect. But, Arturo, we can solve it. Maybe we can fix the back room, make it more comfortable.

Andrés, the problem is not what quarter they give me. The problem is that they give me a room in my own house. Natalia became hysterical. Dad, you can’t go. This is your home. It was my house, Natalia, until you decided that Roberto and Miriam had more rights than me. Dad, I just asked you to change rooms. You kicked me out of my room to give to two strangers. They are not strangers to me. Yes, they are strange. And what’s worse, they’re strangers who have less respect for me than I have for them.

Roberto and Miriam appeared in the room attracted by the screams. When they saw my bags, they immediately understood what was going on. “Arturo,” Roberto told me, “you don’t have to go for us. We can look for another solution. The solution, Roberto, is for you to look for another place to live. But since my daughter prefers to kick me out rather than ask you to leave, I’m leaving.” “Dad, don’t say that,” Natalia yelled at me. “I’m not kicking you out.” “Oh, no. So what are you doing to me?

I’m asking you to be understanding. You’re asking me to leave my room, to move into the ugliest room in the house, to accept being treated like a second-class citizen in my own home. Dad, are you exaggerating? Exaggerating. Natalia, would you move into the back room for two strangers to sleep in your room? She kept quiet because she knew the answer. My grandchildren went downstairs to see what was happening. Grandpa, why do you have suitcases? Because I’m leaving, Sebastian, are you going on a trip?

No, my love, I’m gone forever. Sebastian began to cry. Why are you leaving forever? Because your mom decided that Roberto and Miriam are more important than me. That’s not true, Natalia shouted. You’re my dad. I’m your dad, but you treat me worse than your guests. Dad, can we fix this? No, Natalia, it can’t be fixed anymore. When someone forces you to leave your own room, there’s no turning back. And where are you going to go?

To a place where they respect me. But dad, you don’t have any other place. I’m going to buy a place where they respect me. That’s when I dropped the bombshell that would change everything. Natalia, I just put the house up for sale. What? What you heard, this house is going to sell next week. The silence was deafening. Everyone looked at me as if I had said that the house was going to become a spaceship. Dad, are you crazy? No, I’m crazy, Natalia.

I am tired. You can’t sell the house. I can and I will sell it. It’s my house, it’s in my name and I can do whatever I want with it. But, Dad, we live here. You live here because I allowed you to. But if I’m going to be treated like a tenant, then I’d rather be a landlord somewhere else. And what are we going to do? The same thing they were going to do with me, adapt. Dad, you have to be kidding. Natalia, I never spoke more seriously in my life.

Roberto cleared his throat nervously. Arturo, maybe we’re being too hasty. We can talk about this as adults. Roberto, I am a 70-year-old adult who is being kicked out of his room in his own home. There’s nothing more grown-up than taking control of my property. But where are you going to go? I’m going to buy an apartment where no one can kick me out of my own room. With what money? With the money from the sale of this house. Natalia sat on the sofa with her head in her hands.

I can’t believe you’re doing this. I can’t believe you forced me to do it. I didn’t force you to do anything. No. So what did you just do this morning? I asked you to change rooms. You ordered me to change rooms. You didn’t consult me. You didn’t ask me if I agreed. You informed me of a decision that they had already made without me. Andrés intervened. Arturo, I understand that you are angry, but selling the house is very extreme. Extreme. Do you know what extreme is?

Kick your own father out of his room to make two strangers more comfortable. My parents are not strangers, Andrés said. For me they are strangers, Andrés, and they have less respect for me than any stranger. That’s not true. No, you would ask a stranger to leave his room in his own home. Miriam finally spoke. Arturo, we never wanted to cause problems. Miriam, you didn’t cause the problem. My daughter caused the problem when she decided that you guys were more important than me in my own home.

But what is going to happen to the boys? The children are going to learn a very important lesson, that actions have consequences. Dad, you can’t punish my children for something I did. I’m not punishing them, Natalia. I’m teaching them that when you disrespect someone, that person may decide to walk away from you. And when is the house going to be sold? On Monday the notary comes. The operation closes on Friday. One week. You can’t kick us out with a week’s notice.

You kicked me out of my room with zero days’ notice. That’s different. Why is it different, Natalia? Because you believed that I had to put up with anything because I’m your father, but it turns out that I don’t have to put up with anything. My granddaughter Martina started crying. Grandpa, don’t you love us more? I love you very much, my love, but I can’t live where you don’t respect me. We respect you,” Sebastian said. “You respect me, but your mother does not.” “I respect you,” Natalia shouted.

“Do you respect me? Is kicking me out of my room respecting me?” It was a practical solution. It was a humiliation, Natalia, and I no longer accept humiliation. And if Roberto and Miriam leave, if we tell them to look for another place, it’s too late for that. Why is it late? Because you have already shown what place I occupy in your life. You’ve already shown that when you have to choose between your father and your boyfriend’s in-laws, you choose the in-laws. In other words, that is not true. That’s not true.

So why did you kick me out of my room instead of asking them to find another place? Because they needed to, because they complained and you decided that it was easier to bother your father than to bother them. Roberto cleared his throat. Arturo, Miriam, and I can leave today if that solves the problem. It doesn’t solve anything anymore, Roberto. The damage has already been done. What harm? The harm of knowing that my own daughter considers me less important than you.

That’s not true, Natalia shouted again. That’s not true. So why was it that when Roberto complained of back pain, the solution was to kick me out of my room? Why wasn’t it to buy him a better mattress? Why didn’t he take him to the doctor? Why didn’t he find him another place to live? She kept quiet because she knew she was right, because it was easier to annoy the old man than to look for real solutions. Don’t say that. It’s the truth, Natalia, and the truth hurts.

And if I promise you that something like this will never happen again, Natalia, I don’t believe in promises anymore. I believed in your promise that Roberto and Miriam were going to be here temporarily. I believed in your promise that they weren’t going to be a nuisance. I believed in all your promises and they all broke. But, Dad, everyone makes mistakes. Kicking your father out of his room is not a mistake, Natalia. It’s a decision. A decision that showed me exactly what you think of me and what I think of you.

You think I’m an old man you can handle as you want. You think I can take any humiliation because I’m your father. You think that my needs are less important than anyone else’s. Andrés tried to mediate. Arturo, maybe we all made mistakes. We can start again. Andrés, I don’t want to start over. I want to start somewhere else. But aren’t you sad to leave this house? It makes me sadder to live in a house where I am not respected than to leave a house where I was happy.

And the memories with your wife, the memories I take with me. I leave the humiliations here. Natalia began to cry. Dad, please don’t go. We can fix everything. How, Natalia? I do not know. We can make Roberto and Miriam leave. And then what? The next time you have a problem you will also use me as a solution. There won’t be a next time, Natalia. Before this time there was not going to be once either, and yet it happened.

It was a mistake. It was a decision. A decision you made without consulting me, without caring how I was going to feel. And you can’t forgive me. Natalia, it’s not a matter of forgiving you, it’s a matter of protecting myself. If I stay here, sooner or later you’re going to humiliate me again. That’s not true. That’s not true. So why did you do it this time? Because because I thought you were going to understand. Understand what? That I have to sacrifice myself for the comfort of strangers? They are not strangers. To me they are strangers who treat me worse than a dog.

At that moment my phone rang. It was real estate. Mr Santander, we have excellent news. We already have three offers for your house. Seriously? Yes. One is for 145,000, another for 148,000 and the third for $12,000. All in cash, all to close this week. I accept the 152,000 bill. Perfect. When can we sign the ticket? Tomorrow. Excellent. We are waiting for him at 10 in the morning. When I hung up, the whole family looked at me in shock. Have you sold the house yet? Natalia asked in a broken voice.

Tomorrow I sign the ticket, on Friday the keys are delivered. This is crazy. The insanity was allowing myself to be disrespected in my own home. Dad, please reconsider. I already reconsidered, Natalia, for 3 hours, from the time you kicked me out of my room until I called the real estate agency. And where are we going to live? That’s not my problem anymore. Am I your daughter? Yes, you are my daughter and that is precisely why I expected you to treat me better. And the boys?

Don’t you think about your grandchildren? I think about my grandchildren every day. That is why I am teaching them that no one, not even the family, has the right to humiliate another. You’re traumatizing them. They are traumatized by watching their mother humiliate their grandfather. I am educating them. Roberto approached me. Arturo, this is our fault. We leave ourselves. Roberto, you are not to blame for anything. You asked for something that you considered reasonable. My daughter is the one who decided to give it to me without consulting me.

But we can fix it. It can no longer be solved. The problem was not where you slept. The problem was that my daughter could kick me out of my room without asking me what I thought. Miriam was crying. Arturo, we never wanted to cause this. Miriam, you didn’t cause anything. My daughter caused everything when she decided that I was less important than you in my own home. Natalia stood up abruptly. Stop it. I’m tired of you blaming everything on me.

Who do I have to blame, Natalia? Everyone. Roberto for complaining, Miriam for supporting him, Andrés for not looking for another solution. Natalia, none of them kicked me out of my room. It was you. I asked you to change. You ordered me to change. The difference is minimal. The difference is huge. One is an adult-to-adult consultation. The other is an order given to an employee. You’re not my employee. Exactly. I’m not your employee.

That’s why I don’t take orders. Dad, you’re being impossible. I’m being a person who respects herself. Andrew tried once more. Arturo, what if we talk about all this calmly tomorrow? Tomorrow I sign the sale of the house, Andrés. There is nothing to talk about anymore. You cannot postpone the signing. For what? so that they convince me to stay living where they humiliate me. No one humiliated you, Natalia shouted. You did not humiliate me. Kicking me out of my room in my own home is not humiliating me.

It was a practical solution. It was a practical humiliation. And what do you want me to do now? Nothing, Natalia. It’s too late to do anything. Late for what? Too late to show me that you respect me. You had 70 years to show me respect and you chose to fail me at the most important moment. What is the most important moment? The time when you had to choose between humiliating your father or making your guests uncomfortable. You chose to humiliate your father. Sebastian approached me. Grandpa, is there nothing we can do to make you stay?

Sebastian, my love, grandfather needs to live in a place where he is respected. We respect you. You do respect me, but your mother does not. What if you talk to Mom? I have already spoken with his mother, Sebastián. This morning he told me that I had to move into the back room so that Roberto and Miriam could use my room. And you didn’t want to? No, my love. That room was where I slept with your grandmother Carmen, where I took care of her when she was sick, where she died in my arms.

It was very important to me. And Mom didn’t know it. Sebastian knew this perfectly, but he decided that it was more important for Roberto to sleep comfortably than to protect his father’s memories. Natalia exploded. Enough of playing the victim. It was just a room. Only one room. The room where your mother died was just a room. Mom has already died. Roberto is alive and needs a good night’s sleep. There it is, Natalia. That’s exactly your mindset. The dead don’t matter, only the living who complain matter.

That’s not what I meant. It’s exactly what you meant and it’s exactly why I’m leaving. I grabbed my bags and walked to the door. Where are you going now?, Natalia asked me. To a hotel until I find an apartment. What if we change our minds? Natalia, I don’t change my mind. When someone shows me who they really are, I believe them. I’m not a bad person. You’re not a bad person, Natalia, but you’re a daughter who doesn’t respect her father and I’m not going to allow them to disrespect me anymore.

And if we promise that Roberto and Miriam leave tomorrow, it’s too late for promises. Why? Because the problem was never Roberto and Miriam. The problem was that you decided that they were more important than me. I opened the door and turned to take one last look at the house where I had lived for 45 years. Guys, I told my grandkids, grandpa loves you so much. Never forget that. When are we going to see you?, Martina asked crying.

When his mother learns to respect me. And if he never learns, then when you grow up and can visit me on your own. Natalia ran after me. Dad, you can’t leave like this. How do I have to go, Natalia? Talking things out. I have already talked about things. This morning you told me that I had to move into the back room. I’m telling you I’m moving somewhere else. It’s different. It’s exactly the same. A unilateral decision that affects the other person.

But I’m your daughter. Exactly. You are my daughter. And that’s exactly why it hurts more that you humiliate me. I got into the taxi I had called. From the window the whole family was standing at the door of the house that was no longer mine. Roberto and Miriam looked guilty. Andrés looked confused. The children were crying. Natalia looked angry and desperate at the same time. But I felt free. For the first time in months I felt free. The next day I signed the sale of the house.

The buyer was a young couple with two children who had seen the property the day before and had fallen in love immediately. She’s perfect for our family, I was told. We hope to be very happy here. I’m sure they’re going to be happy, I replied. It is a house where you can be very happy if you respect yourself. During the following week, while I waited for the final deed, I dedicated myself to looking for an apartment. I found a beautiful two-room one in the center of town.

It had a lot of light, a nice view of the square and, above all, it had a room that no one could take away from me. Natalia called me every day that week. Dad, reconsider the sale. We can solve everything. It’s solved, Natalia. How is it solved? I no longer live where I am humiliated. And what are we going to do? What all normal families do, look for a place to live and pay for it yourself. But you know that we don’t have the money to rent such a big house, so rent a smaller house.

And Roberto and Miriam, that’s your problem, not mine. Dad, they’re big people. I’m also a big person and you guys threw me out the same. We didn’t kick you out, they kicked me out of my room. I simply expanded the concept to the whole house. On Friday, the final deed was made. I received $12,000 in cash and handed over the keys to the new family. It was a bittersweet moment. On the one hand, I was sad to lose the house where I had been happy for decades.

On the other, he was relieved that he no longer had to tolerate humiliation. That afternoon I moved into my new apartment. It was small compared to the house, but it was mine. No one could kick me out of my room. No one could give me orders, no one could disrespect me. A week later, Natalia showed up at my apartment. Dad, I need to talk to you. Find a place to live. We are renting a smaller house, but Dad, Roberto and Miriam had to go to a geriatric home.

And aren’t you sorry? Should I feel sorry for it? They are elderly people without resources. I was also an elderly person with no respect in my own home. But you’re my dad. Exactly. I’m your dad and you treated me worse than two strangers. I already told you that I was wrong. To say that you were wrong is easy, Natalia. The difficult thing is not to make mistakes. And what can I do to get you to forgive me? Nothing, nothing, nothing. Because the problem is not that you have to ask me for forgiveness.

The problem is that you humiliated me without thinking twice and my children are not going to meet their grandfather. Your children will meet me when they are adults and can understand why their grandfather had to move away from his family. And in the meantime, in the meantime, they’re going to grow up knowing that actions have consequences, even their mother’s actions. 6 months after selling the house, I’m living the quietest life I’ve had in years. My apartment is comfortable, my routine is mine, my decisions are mine.

No one can kick me out of my room because it is my room in my apartment that I paid for with my money. Natalia continues to call me once a week to ask if I don’t want to reconcile with the family. Dad, the boys miss you. I miss them too, but that doesn’t mean I have to tolerate humiliation to see them. And if I promise you that nothing like this will ever happen again, Natalia, you already made me that promise the same morning you kicked me out of my room.

You said that Roberto and Miriam were going to be there temporarily, that they were not going to bother, that I was going to understand, but now I’m serious. You were serious when you told me that Roberto needed my room for medical reasons as well. The truth is that I no longer trust my daughter and without trust there can be no relationship. She proved that when she has to choose between respecting me and pleasing others, she chooses to please others. And I’m no longer willing to live waiting for the next humiliation.

To you who listened to me here, to you who know my whole story, I want to ask you something very important. There’s someone in your life who treats you like you’re expendable in your own space. Someone who makes decisions about your life without consulting you. My daughter thought she could kick me out of my room because I’m her father, because I have to understand, because I have to be understanding. But it turns out that being a parent doesn’t mean being a second-class citizen in your own home.

Do you know what I learned? that sometimes the only way to regain respect is to stay away from people who don’t respect you, that it doesn’t matter if they are family, if they are friends, if they are whoever they are. If someone humiliates you, you have to be willing to walk away. I’m not saying that you have to sell your house like I did, but I’m saying that you have to set limits, that you have to be willing to say, “That’s it, that you have to value your dignity more than any relationship.

My advice is this: if someone kicks you out of your place in your own home, throw them out of your life. If someone gives you orders in your own space, move them out of your space. If someone doesn’t respect you where you should be most respected, stay away from that someone, because at the end of the day it’s better to live alone with dignity than to live with others without respect. And that lesson, though painful, can save you years of humiliation.